The first time I actually met him was on June 25th, 1965, just before noon. I was 11 years old, and it was in a church that was holding "Vacation Bible School."
Someone was saying, "Everyone close your eyes." Then we were told, "If you want to accept Jesus as Savior and Lord of your life, raise your hand."
It was as if I was pushing my hand up through something thick, perhaps through the heavenlies themselves, that my hand be seen there by the Lord Jesus.
Something happened between him and me that day. I couldn't put it into words at the time, but I've always said of it since, that it was like in one of those corny old movies, you know, when the two lovers run towards each other in slow motion.
I was given a "Soul Winner's New Testament," and I started reading the first chapter of Matthew, but all the funny names were hard to read, and I feared that was all there was to the Bible, so I did not read it anymore.
As a teenager, I knew I wanted him. I'd go to sleep at night, daydreaming about what it would be like to be one of Jesus' disciples, and at night, all the disciples would go to sleep by a campfire along the Sea of Galilee, but Jesus and I would slip behind a rock and talk, but it was just a dream.
When I was 17 years old, I heard the Pastor say something that I didn't believe was in the Bible, so that night, I started to read in Matthew again and got beyond that first chapter. The next day, after I got home from High School, I saw the Bible sitting on my bed. I was ashamed of how much I had enjoyed it the night before and wondered what my school chums would think. I couldn't help myself. I read more. I was getting addicted now. I struggled for a week, trying not to read my Bible, and then just gave into it.
I started praying, realizing Jesus was REALLY real, and I could be his disciple in the times in which I lived. Every night before I'd go to sleep, I asked him to draw near to me.
Then one night, while laying in bed and before I could even begin to ask for him to draw near, I experienced His Presence for the first time, in His Almighty and Kingly Glory and His Glory filled the bedroom! I wasn't at all prepared for that, and it scared me, so I cried, "Go away! Go away!" Then all I could sense from him was love so overwhelming, I've always said since, that it was like the sickly thick sweet aroma of honeysuckle carried on the air of a humid August night in Washington DC. I had never in my life felt love like that, and all I could do was cry.
In all the years since, there have been many times of special closeness to the Lord.
There was the time I was walking in the waves at the beach, and I saw how two lovers had written their names in the sand. I told the Lord that all I wanted in life was to be his lover. I had never heard anyone ever pray like that before, and I didn't know if it was OK.
I got up closer, to see what the lovers had written. It was "CHRIS IS THE MAN," and I put a "T" on the end of "CHRIS" to make it "CHRIST. " Then I just stood there, amazed at what the Lord had me to do. I knew in that moment he wasn't at all grossed out at me wanting to be his lover, but that is the way he thinks of me so much more than ever I can think of him, because such things as this go beyond gender. It is the joining of two spirits together to make one identity, and so is this joining so much deeper than even marriage.
It was about that time that I was building my first harp. I had the unfinished harp beside me as I watched tv, and was thinking about the next step I had to do to build the harp. Two weeks before, I had said to the Lord Jesus, that I wanted "to own his physical presence with him," meaning I just wanted to be very close to him, and then it actually happened that night.
I got up from watching TV, and went into the kitchen to make a tuna fish sandwich. I had the bread out and was mixing the tuna with the mayonnaise, and I casually said, "Lord, our relationship is more like a marriage than a religion," and HE WAS THERE, standing in the kitchen. I could not see him, but I could feel His Presence in physical form standing before me in the kitchen.
I stood before him in the kitchen, and cried for 45 minutes, amazed by his love for me and asking how could he draw near to me like this when my thoughts are sometimes sinful.
We walked together into the living room. I sat down and he sat across from me. Words shot into my mind like bolts of lightning, but in short phrases. The Lord has done this for me for many many years so I know it is his voice, and my own mind is not manufacturing the words. The words that came into my mind were, "You are my harp, and I will play upon you," and then alittle while later, "You are my bondmate."
I am his harp, and my heart strings are his to play, as his love song to all those in this world.
For him to call me his "bondmate," this is too much! It is too wonderful! To be bound by his love to him as his spirit mate forever. There is nothing I could ever want other than this!!!
I Corinthians 6:16b & 17 - "For two (man and woman), saith he (God, in Genesis 2:24), shall be (through being joined to each other in marriage) one flesh. But he that is joined to the Lord (Jesus) is one spirit."
Matthew 22:1 & 2 - "And Jesus answered and spake unto them by parables, and said, The kingdom of heaven is like unto a certain king (God), which made a marriage for his son (Jesus)."
Tomorrow is June 25th, 2008, the 43rd anniversary of the day I said "I do" to the Lord Jesus. I'm putting this writing on my website today, so he and I have tomorrow just to spend with each other, but there's just alittle bit more I must write here, before I leave the computer keys.
Do you know him? Would you like to know him? First, you must know;
Ezekiel 18:4b - "The soul that sinneth, it shall die."
Romans 3:23 - "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God (so all must die)."
Romans 6:23 - "For the wages of sin is death (physical death plus eternal separation from God)."
Hebrews 9:22 - "Without shedding of blood (resulting in death) is no remission (of the death penalty) of sin."
Leviticus 17:11a - "For the life of the flesh is in the blood."
Romans 5:8 - "But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us (his blood being poured out when he died on the cross, that we not have to die for our own sins)."
Romans 10:9,10 - "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth, the Lord Jesus (that Jesus is Lord of all things, even your own life), and shalt believe in thine heart, that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved (from the just wrath of God, not against you, Oh dear me, No, but, his wrath against sin)."
Now pray, claiming Jesus as Lord of your life, and thank him for dying for your sins, and that his life is now shared with you, and yours with him, forever.
Read the Bible. Don't try to understand it with your mind. As you read, the Lord will give you understanding, conveying who he is, to you. Read first, the Gospel of John, then the rest of the New Testament. Then read the Old Testament, looking for hidden meanings and allegory which tell more about Jesus.